Under the revised testing guidelines, this blog will now pay $250.00 for each new comment. Recent studies have shown an opening line such as the one above is more attention getting than the word “Ahem!”
Due to the rigid requirements of those sticky new guidelines, the load of clerical work must be outsourced to Northern Fartonia for processing. Hence, the total amount of fees for the work will equal the payment you get, plus handling costs. Of course, the fees must be submitted by you before the comment bonus can be processed.
If you’re among the people who’d prefer using the old system, in which comments are posted at no charge to you and you receive no payment, there are some minor changes.
As everyone knows, spammers are now the bane of the internet, a bigger PITA then even the most impossible mother-in-law and as hateful as Nancy Pelosi. Many websites use a thing called RECAPTCHA to weed out the spam robots, (called bots), roaming the ‘net world. They ask you to retype two words, with one in some crazy font we old people can’t read, like this:
The new system this blog is trying, since it’s a lot easier, is called Are You a Human. It asks you to select certain items. It shows five pictures on the right and a big box on the left. You’re supposed to drag the two proper items into the box. When you do, your comment will be accepted. It took me a minute to catch on the first time, so this is a heads up for you.
When it shows five items and says “put the tools in the box”, make sure you only move the wrench and the screwdriver, hammer or other tool. Don’t try dragging all five to the box, which is what I did. It gets you a warning saying you aren’t human.
Of course, if one of my exes tries to leave a comment … well, never mind.
Just be sure you move only the items they tell you to move, such as tools, or fruits, or stale Hershey bars, or maybe unfolded pinups from Playboy Magazine.
It’ll be a big help to me if you leave a comment at the bottom. Let me know what you think of this new anti-spam system.
I’m just sayin’.
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